Saturday, January 22, 2011

Jan 1991

I'd reached a turning point with The Idiot. I was enjoying sharing the company of a man who didn't put me down; I felt good about myself in his presence. So I made the split-second decision to investigate an apartment across the interstate from where D lived. Surprisingly, the complex was having a special on one-bedroom apartments, for the same amount of money I was currently paying. I did something I'd never done before: Quit my job without giving any notice, and signed the lease.

My parents helped me move to my new apartment, and my mother left me speechless five minutes after meeting D.

"I like him."

My mouth dropped. "We're just friends; he's twelve years older than me, so this isn't going anywhere..."

"You have always gotten along well with people older than yourself." She put the car in drive and away we went.

The Idiot had threatened to kill himself on New Year's Eve, and after I'd calmed him down, I returned to D's apartment. TI called me the next morning after I'd moved out and threatened again, leaving all sorts of roller coaster emotional messages. I finally spoke to him on the phone, and after getting fed up with it, I cracked.

"Go ahead and kill yourself. I don't care anymore." And slammed the receiver down. I went through 5 minutes of 'What the hell have I done' panic, and called his parents to alert them to his mental status. I also called some of my former neighbors.

Turns out it had been just a threat; as far as I know, twenty years later, he's still alive. He's divorced from the woman he dated after I dumped him, but he's still alive.

I also began the long process of job hunting.

Mega-hugs to Barb Huffert, who lost her great-aunt this morning. We love you Barb, and you're in our thoughts and prayers!


Janice Seagraves said...

Sometimes its a threat and sometimes not, but at least his was.

But you shouldn't ever let anyone blackmail you into a relationship or staying in one. I know a couple of women who actually did. :(

Good for you for not letting him bully you.

Don't waste another thought on that guy. Time to move on.

Unknown said...

I'm glad he was just a threat and you were able to move on with your life.

anny cook said...

Wise choice. Notifying his parents was a good way to deal with the issue. Never give in to emotional blackmail.

barbara huffert said...

Thanks Molly. I keep telling myself it'll get easier. And it will. Just not yet.