Unvarnished Truth, Pt 1

 I discovered something on my recent whirlwind trip to NYC, something I had completely forgotten.

I turn into a royal bitch when I'm stressed.  Not the yelling and screaming kind; the sarcastic, passive-aggressive kind.  I don't like myself when I'm this way, but it happens.  Thankfully, not very often.

It usually occurs when I'm not in control of the situation.  And that is the very foundation of what happened Saturday May 25th.

Friday May 24th:

Plans were set.  I TOLD the person picking me up to please be there at 5:30am, as it would take well over an hour to get to the airport from my mom's facility, where I'd spent the night. Mom and I had gotten our hair cut, been to B&N (I bought the wrong book, but that's okay; I can return it next month and get the correct one), and each bought new shoes and sunglasses. Went to dinner at Olive Garden and discovered my new SWICC (Southwestern Indiana Cantata Choir) windbreaker is in fact, waterproof!

I took a Tylenol PM around 10pm, so I would SLEEP. Mom has a bad habit of staying up late, and I knew I wanted to get up at 4:30.  I actually woke up at 3, in order to use the facilities, and found Mom sound asleep in her chair, with the TV on. When I woke up with my alarm 90 mins later, it was off.  I dressed; Mom woke up; we headed down to the doors.  I'd received a text from A saying they were on the way.  Good!

At 5:40, I was starting to pace.  Where were they? I knew we were only 15 mins from her house.  I saw headlights, kissed Mom....and by the time I got out the doors, the car did a loop around the parking lot and left.  I hurriedly got on the phone.

"I'm here....you just passed me!  Come back!"  

Turned out they hadn't noticed my suitcase on the sidewalk after all.  They came back; I kissed my mom again and loaded my suitcase and backpack into the car, and we drove off.  Doug's GPS said it would only take an hour to get there via 52/65/465, so I tried to sit back, breathe, and calm down.

Things were going well until we hit the Whitestown/Brownsburg exit.  D flips on his turn signal and pulls onto the exit ramp!

"What are you doing?"

"I need to use the bathroom."

Seriously?  I'm running 15 mins late and you have to pee? Didn't you go before you LEFT?  Figuratively grinding my teeth, I climbed out of the car and we ALL emptied our bladders.

6:43 am:  We merge onto 465 and my phone begins blowing up with the group text, as people began arriving and finding everyone else. I send text saying I'm 20 mins away.

7am:  I sent a text, saying I am now 13 mins away, and 1 mile from I-70,

7:15: I finally arrive, and the group is happy to see me!  I profusely apologize for my tardiness, and COMPLETELY forget to empty my water bottle!  I remembered as we started through Security, but it was too late, so I said a brief prayer.

1st issue: I go to check my bag and had to weigh it first.  22 pounds.  Whew!  Then after I get to the payment screen, the damn reader won't accept my credit card.  Had to have the checking agent do it manually, but I finally get my suitcase checked. Anxiety goes up a little, due to the fact I'm the last one through check in.

2nd issue:  I didn't put my feet on the yellow footprints in the X-ray machine.  Oops...it's been 20 years since I last flew.  I comply and exit.  

3rd issue:  I was wearing my compression brace, so they had to pat me down, sit me down, take off the brace, pat IT down, then pat down my compression stocking!  I put my brace back on and look for the bucket with my belongings.  It's on the other side of the machine.

4th issue:  After X-raying my backpack, the agent holds up my water bottle and askes what's in it.  I tell him just water, and he wants me to dump it out.  So I go back out the security area and find Starbucks, to empty it, and go back in.  Turns out I have to go BACK through the X-ray machine!  This time, I do everything right in the machine.....except for not taking off my brace.  Agent barks at me, "Ma'am, are you able to take off your brace?"

"Yes, but they already-"

"I SAID MA'AM, ARE YOU ABLE TO TAKE OFF YOUR BRACE?"

"Yes."

"THEN PLEASE TAKE IT OFF!"

I bit my tongue as the phrase, who the hell pissed in YOUR Cheerios this morning ran through my brain, and took it off and handed it to her.  Assumed the position, then exited the machine.  She pats my leg down AGAIN, then sends me on my way.

By now, I'm so stressed out, I'm nearly in tears, and almost forget to get my phone, shoes, and belt from the bucket!  I'm also LIVID with that TSA agent who told me I did NOT have to go through that again!

Karen W helps me calm down, and we find our gate. Miraculously, we still have about 30 or so minutes before they start boarding. I go in the bathroom and cry, then pull myself together.  THEN discover we can FILL OUT WATER BOTTLES!!!  WTH???  So we can have water on the plane, AFTER ALL???

Makes ZERO sense! I'm also looking forward to seeing my friend and fellow author Jean J while I'm in NYC, so I buy her an Indiana-themed keychain. 

Takeoff was non-eventful; my ears didn't give me any trouble. I read, looked out the window, and enjoyed the pretzel package.

My ears complained a little bit on the landing, but only about a level 2 discomfort.  All I had to do was press my fingers to in front of my right ear, and the crackling stopped.  Easy-peasy.

5th issue:  My friend and roommate was driving to New Jersey, and was nowhere to be seen as we boarded the tour bus.  Turned out her GPS kept taking her to the wrong parking lot.  After waiting 30 mins, we had no choice but to leave without her.  Since I was the one responsible for her even being on the trip, my anxiety ratched up another notch, since I felt it was my fault we were in this situation to begin with. (I know I wasn't, but at this point, the guilt kept pilin' on.....)

I enjoyed seeing the sights, and we arrived at The Occulus for lunch. I tagged along with Aaron and Amy and ordered pizza.  We arrived at the 911 museum and discovered my friend Nan was now in a taxi, trying to find us.  The driver would NOT let her out.....Director Joyce went off to find where they were and to help her find us. Meanwhile, the guy at 911 wouldn't let us un until ALL of us were there, and we were in danger of losing our spot.  See previous paragraph....cue the guilt!

Joyce and Nan finally arrive, with Nan pushing a-I kid you not-a wire CART with her stuff! (Who does that?) We get in 911 and are told to take her stuff to coat check, located on the bottom floor.  Everyone else heads to the beginning of the museum; I decide to stick with Nan, and we end up doing the museum backwards, but that's okay, because we see 75% of it before it's time to meet up.

SIDEBAR:  I was surprised at how emotional I got. When we found the victim's names, I found Todd Beamer's.  The only video I wanted to watch was of the plane crash.  What really hit home was the hijackers flipped the plane UPSIDE down before it crashed.  I can't even fathom.....

What I still can't fathom, to this day, about that horrible event, is how do you choose between burning to death or jumping out a tall building to your death?  As someone who won't even go off the HIGH DIVE at the pool....shudder.

Anyway, I was watching the clock and made sure we had enough time to go through the main exhibit AND still get her cart from coat check.  What I hadn't counted on was a line.

6th issue:  We had 5 mins to rejoin the group, and there are several people in front of us. Thankfully, they were all together, and the lady remembered us, so got through it fairly quickly. We got back in the elevator and headed back upstairs.  

Can't find anyone.

I frantically text, 'Are we at the wrong exit?'

"We're outside."

Big sigh of relief....I look out the window and see everyone. (Did I mention I get tunnel vision and go blind when I'm stressed out???)  We join 'em, look at the waterfalls, take pictures.  We go to Rockefeller Center, take more pics, then head back to the bus.  Nan loads her stuff in the bottom, and we head to the hotel.

By now, it is going on 6pm, and we have to meet downstairs at 6:30 in order to walk to Gayle's Broadway Rose for dinner.  Nan and I find our room; we hurriedly pull out our clothing for dinner and the Broadway show.  At 6:20, Nan climbs in the shower.

My anxiety spikes.  We have to be downstairs in 10 mins, and you decide to SHOWER?  Why not just wash your pits?

7th issue.  I'm dressed and ready; my roommate's in the freaking shower. Maybe she'll just wash her body and get out; after all, that's what I did Friday.  Took my 5 mins.

Nope; she calls to me for help getting her shampoo open.  Turns out she has GLASS JARS (again, WTH??) and her hair is halfway down her back.  I'm nearly hyperventalating at this point as I beg her to please hurry up!

My phone starts to blow up with everyone downstairs, and where are we?  Nan is out of the shower, but now has to dry off, comb her damn hair, and get dressed.  I lie and say we're heading down.  At 6:40, we're in the elevator. Natalie, our tour guide is waiting, and hustles us off to the restaurant.  

8th issue:  We get there to discover one of our members, Pastor Cheryl, tripped over a pedestrian's cart and smacked her head.  Thankfully, her sister's a nurse, and tends to her wounds. We arrive at out table, and there's a tiny salad and a glass of water.  We place our order (I get chicken caesar salad), and it arrives at 7:30.  We now have 15 mins to scarf down our meal and walk to where A Beautiful Noise is.  I decide at that point that I'm going to get up and follow the group, even if Nan is still eating.  I'm THAT stressed!

SIDEBAR:  The singing was amazing!  I did feel sorry for the one who chose to come by our table....she sang a song from the musical Six, about Henry VIII's wives, but we were gobbling up our food in order to make it to the show on time, and didn't really get to appreciate her.

A Beautiful Noise was wonderful!!!!!

9th issue:  Because we'd arrived so late, I didn't have time to go through the merch line, and I forgot about it at Intermission, because it meant having to go back down the stairs (we were in the balcony)/ Also, my poor left knee (the sore one) was jammed into the seat in front of me, not matter how I tried to readjust my body. Also, I sobbed through the 2nd half, and had NO tissues. When it was all over, we decided we were too tired for a drink at Sardi's, so headed back.  I did get a picture of it.

On the walk back, we went through Times Square, before going back to our hotel. Nan and I unpacked and fell into bed.  I got a text which said a group was going to Central Park in the morning, and if we wanted to go, to be downstairs by 8:30. I opted to sleep in and take MY shower.

I dropped so many F-bombs that day, expressing my anger at Nan's decisions, questioning my own loyalty to her, and even my sanity for coming on the trip!  But we survived the 1st day, and hopefully things would slow down for Sunday, as the only thing planned was practice in the afternoon, and a dinner cruise.

Stay tuned for Pt 2 tomorrow!