Flashback Friday: A Community Divided

2001:
Recap:  I'd returned from vacation to discover a mutiny in progress in our Youth Baseball League.  The current VP had decided to take over as President, and appointed one of my 'friends' in my position.

On top of the 9/11 attacks, our tiny community was in an uproar over what had transpired at the banquet.  H and L had their supporters; others expressed outrage and loyalty to me.  The kids who had helped out all season long saw me and expressed their anger and sorrow, because 'You made it FUN!'

In the meantime, my oldest was playing football for the first time, and excelling.  To the chagrin of a neighbor, her child wasn't chosen for a lot of play time, and mine was.  Since she was also behind in her babysitting payments, I decided the best way to handle it would be to write out what I thought was owed and see if it 'jived' with her accounting.  I approached her very non-threatening; just handed her the piece of paper and asked if she thought it was accurate.  The amount owed was just over $100.  I told her, "Catch me up by Christmas, and we're good."

She chose to act as if in shock and scoot farther away from me.  I pretended not to notice.

Two days later, she called me and said L had agreed to watch her kids for her.  I lost my temper.

"Will she watch them when they're sick?  Will she watch them during the holidays?  Will she be willing to take them here and there?"  (I knew from previous conversations L refused to watch kids with a hint of the sniffles, and didn't want to watch other kids during school breaks.)

C snapped back at me, and on Saturday, came storming across the parking lot with a wad of money in her hand.  "Here's your @#$$%% money, and WE'RE DONE!'

Two other moms overheard the exchange and asked me what it was about.  I simply stated the facts; and during the game, another mom came up to me and told me C was telling another version of the story.  Instead of getting angry, I pulled out MY copy of the original 'bill' and showed it.  Some of the moms began to cluster around me, rather than C.  I regret losing my temper in the first place; but 18 months later would reveal C had a chemical imbalance and needed medication.  All would be forgiven in 2002....if I could hang in there.

Next Month:  Learning just how valuable my child was to his football team!

Working Hard....

Kenzie blogged yesterday (finally!)  For a cheerful post and a maybe a chuckle or two, go check out her post.  Otherwise, I'm hard at work on Ch 6 edits for her book.  Yes, she's taken over the brain again....And that reminds me:  I have two interviews I need to finish and send off.

Plus, I need to order my promo items so I can pick them up at closing time on Friday.  So yes, I've got a busy day planned.  How about you?

How's Your Word These Days?

Do our actions back up our words?  Yesterday in church, the sermon centered around another of my favorite parables, the son who said 'No' to his father's bidding, but later went and did it, and the other son who said 'Yes', but didn't do it.  Fr. Dave reminded us that our actions need to back up our words; that our word used to be valuable; otherwise others will see us as untrustworthy.

I'm a loyal person, and identify with the first son.  A lot of times (growing up), I wouldn't want to do things, and either had to be nagged to death or I'd do my chores 'when I wanted to'.  As I entered college and moved out on my own, I earned the respect of my boss at the country club, because I was willing to do 'the dirty work'.  In other words, I cleaned up the kitchen wait station every night.  And this was thanks to an older waitress who befriended me; she made the job go faster by singing, and naturally, I joined in.  And soon it was a nightly habit.

My friends know if I say I'll do something, I'll do my darnedest to get it done/be there for them/whatever.

This was tested in 1998, when we had moved to a new community.  Several moms weren't happy with a certain situation, so I, being the 'let's see what we can do to resolve this' person, offered my ideas, and everyone jumped on board with one of them.  So I set to work; gathered the necessary info, and set the plan in motion.  To my surprise, every single mom in that group balked at taking the next step.  After many phone calls, I gave up.  I wasn't about to start something w/o support, but I did send a letter to a teacher, voicing my concern.  She took the letter to the principal, who in turn took it to the superintendent, who implemented part of my idea, and the moms first grumbled about it, but then congratulated me.  WTH?  I couldn't fathom why they were upset for being excluded.  They would rather gripe about the issue than fix it?

And the issue arose again the next year, and another new mom in the community took the same action I had, with similar results.  If the moms had banded together in the first place, this wouldn't have taken two or more years (although by the 4th year, the original complaint had been resolved!), and we'd all been happy.  But the DUMB thing was, that group excluded me from then on, 'because we didn't fit in'.  One mom later told me my actions 'scared' them.  WTH?  Just because I'd rather ACT then bitch, whine, and moan about the problem?  Come ON!

I will admit, since getting married twenty-plus years ago, that my word has been broken in the financial area. When a payment is due, and since we're on a limited budget, I'm the one who deals with the phone calls or the payment arrangements.  My spouse has driven me crazy because I'd promise to pay X amount to ABC, but on payday, he would write checks for XYZ.  Or chew me out for making those arrangements or writing the checks myself.  So after a while, I stopped making promises.  I was tired of getting the phone calls 'You promised you'd pay us...'  and me saying, 'I know, but the spouse refused to cooperate.'

I'm the same with my online persona.  If I make a comittment to an interview/chat/guest blog, I put it on my  yahoo calendar; my family calendar; and my own personal one.  Yes, there have been an instance here or there where something's come up and I've been unable to attend, or totally forgotten about, but those are few and far between.

So what's YOUR word worth these days?  Mine's slipped to silver status, from a bill collector's POV, ha ha....

Saturday's Stupid Saying

Caller:  Hey, can you help me?  My computer has locked up, and no matter how many times I type 11, it won't unfreeze.


Tech support:  What do you mean, 'type 11'?


Caller:  The message on my screen says "Error, Type 11".

actual computer tech support call

The Times They Are A-Changin'....
No one seems to be happy with the 'improvements' Facebook has implemented.  For Google +, this may be the jump start it needed, as many of my friends are now migrating over there.  I don't find it as 'user-friendly', but I do remember to post over there occasionally.  And since FB apparently doesn't want me posting my son's football videos, I'm currently attempting to upload them over at G+.  I got some excellent coverage of the youngling's game, but FB would only allow 2 videos.  We'll see how many G+ lets me upload,

Another thing which is changing is chats.  When I joined the internet community back in 2007, chats were popular.  I met most of my blogmates on the LRC loop, and more on the NSH loop (you'll notice I still have my NSH picture posted).  I'm now a moderator on RBRU loop, and belong to maybe thirty or so more.  I know people who belong to upwards of 100 loops and I cringe at the thought of their email overload.  I have trouble keeping up with the ones I only receive digests on; there are others where I'm on 'special notice' and ones where I don't receive any mail from.  If I feel the need to check in on those loops, I do so.  And when I posted interviews on here, I made the rounds the morning they posted.  Some people saw them and came over; others ignored the post.  Which is fine; I ignore probably 90% of the posts myself, unless there is an interesting topic of conversation.

Anyway, back to chats.  I've tried to attend a favorite author's chat once a month and I've noticed attendance dwindling.  When I show up, I'm mainly a cheerleader.  I have posted an excerpt here and there, and it maybe garners a comment or two.  A few months back, the lone reader revealed she was into the paranormal books, so that leaves my books out.  And this past week, I guess something caught the reader's eye, because she asked me for my website.  So who knows?  Maybe I've gained a reader; maybe she was just being polite.

I have shown up on one of my publisher's scheduled chats; no word yet on if it garnered any sales.  And thanks to the digest and Yahell changing it's calendar, I missed out on another publisher's chat last night.  I guess I'm going to have to start checking the individual calendars at the beginning of the month.  LRC sends out a newsletter, so I mark my yahoo calendar for the ones where I think I'll show up.

The RBRU chat loop is being discontinued, due to authors not showing up for their own chats, or no one showing up to chat WITH them.  I'm guilty of this; Sundays are horrible for me, due to family obligations, and I've forgotten about or been unable to attend the ones I wanted to.  The one time I moderated, the family griped and went to lunch without me, but the author didn't show up and I spent an hour talking to myself and two other people.  Thankfully, the family DID bring me a take-out sack.

Blogging:  It's hit-and miss.  The very people who urged me to blog every day now go weeks without saying a word, or only post once a week, or now belong to group blogs where they only have to post once a week or month.  I don't know if the traffic some people generate is due to posting their info on the loops, or social media, or what.  I used to spend an hour every morning reading and commenting.  Now, I don't have the luxury of time anymore, so if I stop by and have something to say, yippee!  It neve  r fails; I'm in the middle of typing a comment when I'm needed for something else around here, and when I try to explain, I'll hear "That's not important; get up and help me!" followed by a tirade of how I waste time on the stupidest things. Excuse me; I'm networking.  Yeah, I may not be getting paid by the week, but I do get paid every three months, so shut up!  Oh wait....that's not a 'real' paycheck'...but that's another blog topic.

So what's YOUR favorite way of keeping up with authors?  Is it checking in with us on blogs?  Social Media?  Following our word counts on Twitter?  Or do you check in with the publishers to find out release dates?  Do you regularly pop into Fictionwise, B&N, ARE, and Kindle, to see what's 'hot'?  Curious minds want to know....especially since I'm facing three releases in the next four months.

Flashback Friday: Football!

Sept 1991:
I was now nearly seven months pregnant and finally showing.  I'd bought some maternity clothes, and my boss at the country club gave me the okay to wear my white uniform shirt on the outside of my black work pants.  One of my 'favorite' kids, now off to college, brought three of his friends in, sat at my table, and pointed to my obvious condition.

"She's carrying my baby."

I swatted him on the head with a menu and rolled my eyes.

"In your dreams, J.  Only in your dreams."

I also met my new doctor.  My previous OB-GYN was too expensive, so I swallowed my pride and applied for Medicaid.  And was assigned a new doctor, whom I didn't like at first.

I argued with the nurse, who wanted me to undress.  I told her I HAD been getting monthly check ups, and was in good health, and on prenatal vitamins.  Dr. White came in, took a look at my chart, and agreed that since my file had been faxed over, there was no need for an internal exam.  He checked the baby's heartbeat and my general health and sent me on my way, agreeing with the previous doctor to restrict my lifting to ten pounds and not to do anything strenuous.  He also questioned my weekend job, but when I informed him the busboys were taking care of me, and not letting me carry anything larger than two dinner plates, he calmed down.  And sent me to the lab for my gestational diabetes test and scheduled me for a Rhogam shot.  And speaking about said shot...

"Mom, It's True:   I was Switched At Birth!"
My entire life I'd been told my blood type was Rh+.  So when the lab told me I was Rh-, I 'knew' something was wrong, and had them retest.  Again, Rh-.  When I went back for a third test, the results were the same.

"Molly....you're going to HAVE to accept the fact you're Rh negative."

I went home and called my mother, who couldn't believe the news.  We had a good laugh over my 'switched at birth' joke, then called me several days later after searching for everyone's blood type.

"Turns out we're not sure what your dad's blood type is; there's no record of it!"

She sent HIM to the lab, and sure enough, I'd inherited his blood type!   Which meant...I needed a Rhogam shot, since my new hubby's blood type was RH+.

Football Season:
I discovered something about my husband of four months:  He was NOT a fan of Monday Night Football.  And since we only had one TV, I was not able to watch it.  The previous year (not sure if I mentioned this or not, lol!), I made a pizza bet with one of my co-workers on MNF, and out of 10 weeks, I only had to pay up three times.   Yes, he bought me seven pizzas that fall:)

Colts fans, help me out!  Was Jeff George still the QB in 1991?  If he was, I preferred Jack Trudeau, the backup QB.  George was always getting hurt, and Jack did a much better job of getting the ball down field.  And was this the year we joked about taping Eric Dickerson's paycheck to the ball so he'd hang onto it?

Kitten Update:
Our 'grand-kittens' were now five months old.  We took Gizmo to the vet to have her spayed; the boys wandered around the apartment in shock, since she had to stay overnight (Tag was especially upset, lol!).  Mama Smokey continued to come by the apartment for food, but she refused to enter.  Especially if the kittens would run to the door.

Life Update

(Holds up hands) I know what you're thinking; three posts this week?  I'll admit; my blogging has slacked off in recent months.  My online time was limited over the summer, and with the addition of my 45 minute walk, it's nearly lunchtime when I finish with the email and Facebook updates.  Add to that a daughter who goes to physical therapy twice a week and a son with flag football practice three nights a week plus cub scouts, and my time is not my own anymore.

But I've tried to make an effort...and some of you still come back and 'see' me, so thought I'd update you on what's going on in the writing life.

1)  I'm still waiting for my official edits to arrive for Love On The Rocks, which is due to be released sometime in the next five weeks.

2)  I finished self-editing Love Finds A Way and sent it to my editor.

3) Was in the middle of self-editing Forbidden Love when Kenzie's editor sent edits for Teacher's Pet.

4) Had to take a crash course in track changes in order to show said editor that I DID make changes; I'm currently having to copy/paste one chapter at a time and show changes.  As you may guess, this is time consuming.

5) I'm also gearing up for a busy October:  I have signings lined up for the 1st, 8th, and 22nd.  I'll try to update my schedule of events to the right.

6) I've been hooked on reruns of The Waltons, and now it appears I've seen just about every episode...but I think there are still a few I've missed, so will keep checking the daily schedule (three per day).  I HAVE been keeping up with Survivor, and kept up with Big Brother over the summer. (Note to self:  Need to blog about the winner...)

7) Our income had dropped so much since the spouse retired, the kids qualified for Medicaid, which also pays for dental visits.  Both S and W had cavities, so next week they're getting those taken care of.

8) Even though we qualified for Medicaid, we still make $300 too much for food stamps.  Grrrrr.....maybe my royalty check will cover the holiday baking supplies?

9) The SU told me he can tell I've lost inches from my waistline and my stomach seems to be firming again.  Now if my butt would shrink....

10) CK (college kid) is missing his little brother, and skypes with him at least once a week:)

Anything interesting you'd care to share with me?

Are You KIDDING Me? (pt 2)

Saw this yesterday and it was the topic of discussion on the radio:

"No more F's, because it makes students feel bad..."

"Students will now get 'H's instead, and given multiple chances to improve their grade."

"No more valedictorian...the speech at  graduation will be determined by a random draw..."

WTH?

What idiot thought that up?

So the kid who actually CARES about his GPA and works his/her heart out doesn't get the chance to be first in his/her class?  And the kid who wants to drop out but stays in due to parental pressure will be taken by the hand and given chance after chance to 'improve'?  Oh, and might get chosen to give the speech.

Give me a break!

I received three 'F's in school.  One in 7th grade history (I hated the teacher); one in 9th grade Biology (again, disliked the teacher); and the first time I took Econ in college (you guessed it; teacher was the reason!).

Did it make any difference to my self-esteem?  Okay, I admit; I was terrified to tell my parents.  But after we talked about it and discussed options, I was okay.  I survived it.  My fellow students were to blame for my 'self-esteem' issues, lol (I got over that also!)

I have one kid who worked hard to get out of the #3 slot....his BFF was #1, and there was a girl between them.  He was thrilled the day he finally 'jumped over' her.

I have another child who does well, but since we're in another school system, could care less about her GPA.  The rule at our house is Do Your Best....and if she brings home a C or less, we talk about improving.  She was a straight A and B student up until HS, so I know she can do it.

Now the youngling is in a class by himself, figuratively.  We think he either is dyslexic or ADD; the forms have been filled out and testing is coming soon.  His reading IS improving, and he's starting to 'get' his math skills.  We'll most likely have to retain him this year, unless something happens and the switch in his brain suddenly engages.

But I do NOT want him handled with 'kid gloves'.  If he's not making the grade, let me know!  There are resources to get him where he needs to be.

If this goes through, we'll be raising a generation of kids who think they will get multiple chances to 'get the job done'.  And I don't see Donald Trump willing to risk it.

Currently Reading:  Finished Angel by Sharon Hamilton last week, and OMG!  Recommended Read!  It's a little long, and at first I thought I had the plot figured out.  Nope; she surprised me and went another direction.  And now she tells me a sequel will soon be available, so I'm eagerly looking forward to it!  Good job Sharon!  I'm now up to page 50 (I think!) in Motor City Wolf by Cindy Spencer Pape.  I'll be honest; the first two books in this series didn't interest me, but MSW got my attention the first time she posted the blurb.  And after reading the first couple of chapters, I now want to read the other two!  I love the characters, and want to read their 'back story'.  So slap me upside the head....I love Cindy's other books, so why the hell did I think this series would be any different?