I went home over the weekend to get away from the stress and to attend a 50th anniversary party for friends of the family. My mom wasn't feeling up to going, so thankfully I was able to fill in.
I'm still not ready to talk about the upheaval in our lives; I'm beginning to calm down and make decisions for all involved. I've opened up to only a handful of close friends, and I thank you for your continued prayers. I promise in a month or so I'll disclose everything. I just need time.
On top of everything, I discovered one of my first serious boyfriends passed away last week. JF was the man who taught me about how to live with the opposite sex. During my 3rd year of college, I practically lived with him every weekend. He was ten years my senior, and I was working weekends, so on Friday I'd pack a bag and he'd pick me up after work. I wouldn't return to the dorm until Monday morning, as J had to be at work at 8am and my first class wasn't until 9am.
I'd made a huge mistake on Halloween that year, and as a result we didn't see each other for several weeks. A girl in my 9am class shared an evening class twice a week with J, who carried messages back and forth, as well as telling us how miserable the other was. When I received word of my pending graduation date, I swallowed my pride and called him. He picked me up; we talked; I ended up sleeping over that night. We decided to continue seeing each other, and I even told him I'd stay with him if he asked; I didn't know if I was ready to be separated from him for two months until continuing on with college.
Month #1 went well; we reunited on his birthday. Month #2 depressed me, and my clingy-ness drove him into the arms of another woman. I was devastated, and it was eight months until I even considered dating again.
Mutual friends kept me in touch with him over the years. He married three more times in the past 25 years, and passed away quietly at home with wife #6. There will be no funeral; no showing, per his wishes. I expressed my condolences to his widow, and we had a several-hour dialogue on Face Book last week. She invited me to stop by any time and share memories of him; I may do that after giving her some time. And another good thing has come of this: For years I've often wondered what happened to mutual friends of JF and myself; now I'm 'caught up'.
I regret not going to see him in the past 6 years I've been back in town; I last saw him in 1992, when a friend and I came down to show off our new babies. I thought I'd run into him eventually; it's a small town. But no....and I extended an invitation back in 2008 for him to come to Evansville, where I was signing books. His no-show left me with the feeling he'd moved on and wasn't interested in seeing me. Now I learn he either never received it or the invitation was misplaced.
But I have happy memories of him; the book loosely based on him will be out in January, and I located the pictures I'd taken of him 25 years ago.
NaNo begins tomorrow and I'd planned to carve out some writing time, in order to either drag Lynn and Nick back from vacation and talk to me, or else concentrate on either Brock and Trisha or Rick and Thalia, two paranormal romances which are clamoring for attention. But the way today has gone, I may just have to commit one hour a day to writing. Every time I settle in, someone wants my attention, be it email, D griping about the housework, or kids needing homework help or needing rides here and there. I still have two interviews to finish for next month, plus my blog post on the 19th. I'll try to be here on a semi-weekly basis, so bear with me!
Tonight, S will be taking the youngling around. I'm going to attempt Mummy Dogs (hot dogs wrapped in crescent roll strips ala mummy) and Mac-n-Cheese since it's an easy, non-complicated meal.
Tomorrow, both S and youngling have dr. appointments; S for her gastritis and youngling for possible ADD. And it's payday, so it means I get to put food in this house. And buy some books. Yes, the SU has agreed to let me spend $10 on new books:)